I Could Get Used To This!!

Surprisingly I’ve had a really good couple of days. When I say good I don’t mean it as in the sense of what most people might associate it with such you know that feeling you get when you have come back from a long walk in the countryside admiring the beauty of nature, when your legs are aching because you walked a bit too far but it doesn’t come into it at all and you feel like this glow all over and a sort of sense of satisfaction. Well that’s the feeling I’m having at the moment.

My breathing has been somewhat under control although I guess it hasn’t changed a great deal medically just an emotional thing. I have felt a lot happier in myself and wanting to get out and as I have mentioned in the last few posts actually “Live My Life”. After what seems like a lifetime of obviously not doing this it is a bit of a novelty I guess but having been enjoying it so much it will hopefully continue on. I have started to ask for help a whole lot more too and not attempt to kill myself and in a strange way I am enjoying that now. Doesn’t everyone want to be waited on hand and foot after all if their honest and I suppose I am just taking it one step further. Yes, I have lost the choice aspect of it in some ways but I have gained back some of the control side of things too. The choice is still there too just maybe a different one that’s all.

As a result of this new found approach I have started to return to doing a few things that I used to do a while back such as cooking a lot more. Nothing too adventurous, things like the Bacon Sarnies which goes without question but I have also done what I think is actually my first attempt at a Caramelised Onion and Mushroom and Bacon Quiche which was divine and I also made a couple of Seafood Pies topped with Parmesan Mashed Potatoes which were equally as nice, in fact I’m going to have the last one for lunch later on. It’s the good old favourite, Liver, Bacon, Mushrooms, Onion and Gravy for tea later on which I actually adore.

I also noticed when we went out on Wednesday that the slopping curbs that I had been promised would be done around here by the end of last week had still not been done. So I rang the director and was ready for a fight. To my surprise he stopped me in my tracks. He was saying, after passing through the area the other and noticing this himself he was furious and got straight onto it. As a result they are doing them on Monday and Tuesday next week and he has apologised profusely.

I had a visit to the Dermatology department yesterday too which although I knew was going to be a bit of a waste as there is not a lot that can do for me as in treatments etc except to say carry on what you are doing, I thought that I would at least be able to get the consultant to write a letter in support of financing this Extracorporeal treatment which he is all too pleased to do for me. I’m not expecting that he has any more weight in this than probably the cleaner who I always see moving the mop around in exactly the same spot in exactly the same corridor at Heath Towers every time I go there. I think she might be trying to dig a tunnel out of there maybe??

As part of this new era I have decided too that unfortunately the car is going to have to go, well get changed anyhow. I am finding it now, quite hard to get in and out apart from the fact I haven’t been able to drive it for some months now as I am no longer safe I guess. Some people may say mind you that I never was safe in the first place. I rang Motorbility to enquire what the implications would be as I still have 2 years to run on this contract and they were wonderful. I can change it no problem at all. There is a small penalty charge of £100 but I found out that the £500 deposit we paid when we got the car is refundable pro rata and as such they will just take it out of this and I will get what’s left back to spend on me!!!!! Now where did I put that list???? I didn’t waste any time and got straight on the web and started looking for me new motor. There are loads to choose from. I need a vehicle which is Wheelchair Accessible and also has ample head room inside as some of these vehicles seem to be very cramped. I don’t particularly want to spend any money on a deposit or else I will not get to buy any prezzy’s for me. I have settled for this one HERE. It is the only one that I can find that has a high roof as standard anyhow and the view from the wheelchair and overall space looks good. It should make a big difference all round not least of all for Judith or whoever is with me who will no longer have to lift the scooter in and out and set it up for me. There’s always the fact that I get in such a mess just getting to the car and then getting in and out. All that will change now, well as soon as I can try and get my Dad to come and fix my back gate and build me a bit of a ramp down from the decking outside the Lounge French Doors. That way I can just drive straight from my armchair around the house and up the ramp into the back of the car and all without the need for pit stops and tyre changes too.

Okay I had better get up and pop some pills now I think as no one else seems to want to take them for me, spitefull buggers!!!!

See Ya!!