I hate this part of the blog and to be honest I tend to not even read them when I visit other blogs etc, because I think that you can get a more accurate and often more up to date picture by reading through the Postings, but if you insist on having one here then, here you go….

I am 39 married to a wonderful woman, Judith and have a daughter named Tara. We live in the Vale Of Glamorgan, in South Wales UK. We all lad a pretty much “Normal” life if there is such a thing, till in December 2003, on the 17^th to be precise, I was dealt a blow by being diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia (A.L.L) by some numb wit of a Doctor with all the tact of stampeding elephant. He pretty much drew the curtain around the bed as I was in Hospital at the time after having a suspected heart attack, having done blood test, and just came out and said,” You Have Leukaemia”. That’s it no explanation or anything, then just walked off leaving me behind the curtain to deal with it on my own. Well as you can imagine, I was in a bit of a mess to say the least. How long do I have left, why me, I’M GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!!! Going round and round in my head and no one to talk to about it. He did make another brief appearance later on mind you but that was only to come and tell me that I had to phone Judith my wife and let her know over the phone that I was going to die, charming huh???

Well that was the start of what I see really as my second life as to honest things have changed in so many ways that they hardly relate at all to my life prior to all this. I don’t just mean the physical stuff like all the medical problems its left me with, but also the mental changes such as a bad lack of memory retention, my outlook on life, priorities, tastes etc etc, the list is endless. I actually look in the mirror, although I tend to avoid it a lot and I don’t see the John I know and have memories associated with, it’s a really weird feeling. I thought for a long time that this chance of a “New Start” so to speak could be seen as really good thing, in fact most people would love to be given this chance I guess, but in reality the feelings and thoughts and emotions etc of the old me are what makes me who I am today and to be honest I wouldn’t change a thing. You can’t just pick and choose what parts of the old person you want to keep and which to throw away although I have tried to do just that, but let me assure you that it doesn’t work.

Okay on the health stuff. Apart from the treatments such as the dreaded Chemo and Radiation Therapy and high dose Steroids etc, I have been on a rocky road all through this and sadly a lot of it could have been avoided too. Hers a bit of list although there is bound to be something I miss out but in reading the blog you will pick up on some of them.

• C.O.P.D - caused by a serious chest infection I got from a hospital bug strangely enough whilst in hospital called Pseudomonas. This has left me with severe breathing difficulties resulting in the need for regular oxygen. I am unable to walk more that 1 or 2 metres without having to stop to get my breath which as you can imagine causes a number of problems. Even simple tasks like washing and dressing are a battle and take 10 times longer than normal.
• G.V.H.D (graft versus host disease) - a rejection of my body by the Stem Cells donated by my Little Sister Ruth in October 2004. It has caused me to have a very severe skin problem which is basically, extremely itchy with no way of relieving it either and the main problem is the skin tightness. The easiest way of explaining it is to imagine that your skin is 5 sizes too small for your bones and is stretched taught, or that your skin is severely burnt, well that is pretty much it in a nutshell. This along with the C.O.P.D I mentioned has left me pretty immobile and need to get about in a wheelchair or my newly purchased scooter. I am not able to get upstairs either so am forced to sleep in an armchair in the living room.
• Faulty Heart Valve – forgive me as I never remember the actual diagnosis. My left hand ventricle is only working at around 30% efficiency and my right hand ventricle is working around 60%. Doesn’t cause many problems although along with the 2 other conditions I have mentioned so far it certainly plays its part in slowing me down etc.
• Hearing Loss - My left ear is only hearing 20% and the right ear 70% so I require 2 hearing aids to make up for the loss of hearing. They sort of do the job although my hearing loss does seem to getting a little worse so not sure of the future position.
• Teeth - In the run up to having the Stem Cell Transplant from my Sister, I had to have my teeth checked over for any likely problem areas to be sorted reducing the risk of infections etc. As a result of this they actually had to take out around 13 of the 17 I had left. This was a horrific thing to go through. They took 6 in one go then the other 7 a week or so later. Arggggggg!!!!!! They have been nice to me and given me my own sets of plastic ones though, aren’t they nice???

So as you see life is somewhat difficult as a result of all these things thrust upon me and all in the cause, apart from the hospital bug I suppose, of ridding me of Leukaemia which they have, well, if you count being in Remission since Oct 2004 of ridding me of it??

I have as a result of all this had a lot of time on my hands more so of late. Some would say that this is not a good idea, giving me time to think. I have used this time and intend to go on doing so too, to kick some politician butt. I have become a bit of a one man mission to eradicate the wrongs done to people in general although obviously a lot is to do with being disabled such as access to shops, government buildings etc etc I am quite vocal on issues such as the Crap Patientline TV/Phone scam run in hospitals and the outrageous Prescription charges Cancer Patients are forced to pay along with the thousands of pounds on other stuff too such as transportation etc etc.

Well I think this has gone on long enough now. If you want the real, up to date story just read through the last few blogs and I’m sure you’ll pick it up. Please feel free to contribute via the comments on each post or emailing me via the links. I welcome any contributions you might have to whatever it is and it is just nice sometimes to hear that people are actually reading my rants.

See Ya!!